Red satin is neat

I was harvesting stuff from my garden. Of course, I can't just go out and pick stuff, I have to do it in some weird, dreamy way. I harvested my garden Mah Jong style. What? Oh yeah, I matched plants and when I picked two that matched they disappeared. I don't question this crap.

So after I got the goodies picked I decided to wrap the garden to kill off all the weeds and grass and stuff so it would be all ready for the next planting season. I didn't wrap it in mulch, though, that would be too easy. I wrapped it in red satin.

It was really important for me that the strips of satin that I used be exactly the same. As I was cutting the fabric into strips I took great care to make sure that the ends matched and they were of equal length.

I was sitting in my livingroom getting ready to cut a third strip when I realized that my garden was actually in the center of the room and was only about a 3 foot square area cut out from the hardwood floor. I had way too much fabric and would never need all 3 strips.

livin' it up diner style

I had another “stuff I want but can’t quite have” dream, well, series of dream vignettes, I suppose. I can only remember one, though. It dealt with my living situation and what it could be. My son and I had moved back in with my mother, in the old house that I dream of often, and were taking up residence on the second floor where I lived when I was younger. Usually when I dream about the house it is different in the dream than it truly was. This time it was exactly the same as real life, except I had all my current furniture with me. My son and I were setting up a little apartment in the upstairs. One room was his and one was mine.

In addition to my pretty purple couch (a real life entity) I had acquired a set of tables and booths from some restaurant (I really, really want them). The tops were painted metallic red and the booths were metallic red vinyl. Beautiful. I was just getting the furniture set up, which is the only good part about moving, and we had to leave for some reason.

When we got back to our apartment my mother had gone through everything and left a big mess. None of the furniture was where I had left it and everything was scattered on the floor. I tried to move it back but I wasn’t strong enough.

Another part involved a boy; ‘nough said.

Tribble cookies

A male friend of mine was smitten with a girl and he wanted me to help him make her cookies. I figured that, since I was already making them, I would make some for me too. I made about 10 different kinds of really elaborate, gourmet type cookie creations. I didn’t like this girl very much and I didn’t want my friend with her so I waited until I made her “special cookies” and I put a whole bunch of salt on them. Not enough that she would get sick, just enough that she would think they were gross and lose interest in my friend. I made a plate for him and a plate for me, putting the salty ones on the bottom.

My friend took off with his plate of salty goodness and I went walking down the street with mine, looking for a gas station so I could buy cigarettes.

An old jeep pulled up next to me. The passenger door opened and inside was karate teacher that I don’t know outside dreamland. He was really, really fat- giant and he had removed the passenger and back seats so there would be room for his big fat ass. He was kind of pissed because I wasn’t in class and he told me to get in. I told him that there wasn’t room for me and that there was only one seatbelt. He leaned over and pushed the inside of the jeep, making it wider. He said we could share a seatbelt. I got in.

In the car I was tempting him with cookies. I was using every peer pressure method in the book to get him to try one-just one! He kept refusing because he was “on a diet”. I told him that some of them were really thin and would be fine for his diet. He wasn’t buying it.

I ended up back at my mom’s house. I was in her bedroom, sitting on her bed talking on the phone to my friend about random bullshit when I saw something unusual on the floor. I watched it for a while, trying to figure out what it was.

It was very flat but it had silky hair, sort of a cross between a Tribble, a Lhasa Apso and a Skate-not the rolly kind, the skim the ocean floor kind. It was really weird but it was so cute and it moved really fast-it was into everything.

I watched as it floated along the floor and rolled its self up to look like a conch shell and this iridescent white color. Then it unraveled and sort of slithered around the room. I called for my mom to come see. She answered that “it better be good” because she was eating dinner. It slithered up into her book shelf and started hissing.

I told the friend I was going to send him a picture on his phone so he could see and he said, “Make it a good one”. My mom came over near the bed where the thing was and I took a picture of it and her feet.